Pulse
by BlueBlood359
Summary: A ghostly hush filled the room. The only sound heard was the shrill screeching of the heart monitor. " Come on," I whispered. Then we heard the one sound we had all been waiting for, the consistant beeping that indicated a heartbeat.
1. Chapter 1

1**Disclaimer: Not Mine!!!!!**

**Pulse**

**Chapter 1: The Announcement**

"Is it just me, or can you see the powder lines of his makeup all over his face?" Asked Edward from beside me. We were lying on his couch watching the worst vampire movie ever made. It wasn't even about real vampires but rather a group of kids who followed this one guy that thought he was a real vampire. It was horrible. I didn't mind much though, I wasn't watching the movie.

"Yeah, I can see it even without your vampire vision." We both looked away from the screen when we heard the front door slam. Carlisle walked into the living room brusquely, a mixture or nervousness and worry etched into his flawless face. I looked to Edward, silently asking him to explain. He shook his head slightly before looking back to him.

"I'm calling a family meeting. Now." He spoke in his normal voice but I'm sure everyone in the house had heard him. He looked pointedly in our direction, I understood. I grabbed my car keys from the floor by me and stood up, away from Edwards arms. I rubbed my hands on my thighs, suddenly self conscious.

"I'll see you later."I managed to keep my voice normal as I started for the door.

"Bella," Carlisle said calmly.

"This concerns you too, you know. We all regard you as a member of this family." I felt the blush rising in my neck and I didn't even attempt to hold back my smile as I made my way back to Edward's side. He was looking at me outrage and confusion written clearly in his eyes.

"Silly Bella," He murmured before running his lips over my throat. By then, the living room was filled with the rest of the Cullens. Carlisle took a deep, unnecessary breath before beginning.

"I've been working on something at the hospital for the last few years and I think I may finally have perfected it." His voice held an undertone of pride and I knew he was rather proud of his accomplishment, whatever it may be. I looked to Alice hoping she may have some clue but she looked as confused as the rest of us. Carlisle ran his hands through his hair and smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"I've been experimenting with the restarting of dormant coronary systems, and re-inflating tissues, organs, and blood vessels." I looked around the room at everyone's faces, they all were masks of shock and awe, yet I was still confused I had never been to medical school or to college numerous times. I had just finished high school. I tilted my head back to look at Edward. He wasn't looking at me, instead, his eyes were focused on Carlisle and I knew they were having a conversation. Then his face softened and his eyes turned down to meet mine, they were shining and there was a steely determination buried in their depths.

"Can it be done?" Asked Jasper, his voice sounding slightly off to me.

"I haven't had the opportunity to test it yet but I'm the possibility of it working correctly as of now is a bit over 89.00094 percent. I just need to test it out. I originally planned to try it myself, but I can't monitor everything and perform the change myself. I need one of you to do it. I know that I'm asking all of you to take a major risk and I promise you that I won't have any heard feelings to those of you who are not willing to take the risks involved." I could hear what he was saying but it was like a foreign language to me, I didn't understand all of the clinical talk and right at this moment I wasn't paying complete attention to it either. Edward was still looking it my eyes and I could feel my heart fluttering in my chest.

"I thought about it and have come to the decision that I would offer the chance to Rosalie first, since she's the one who most detests being what we are. If Rosalie refuses the offer than goes to Jasper, since he still is having trouble coping with our lifestyle."

I dragged my eyes from Edward and looked to Rose. She had visibly straightened, holding herself up against the wall. Her face was vibrant, she was radiating excitement and as a result her eyes were dancing. But when she noticed me looking her smile disappeared, I could feel my face flush with nervousness. Had I done something wrong? Rosalie and I were just beginning to interact with each other I hoped I hadn't done something to ruin it already. She looked away from me and I was left feeling rejected. Her gaze stopped at Carlisle.

"Who's your next choice after Jasper?"

"I hadn't thought that far. If I had to choose now, probably Edward." His voice held an undercurrent, like there was something in her question hat told him something. Rosalie turned to look at me again, but this time she was looking at Edward too, she smiled slightly but it looked sad.

"I don't want it." She whispered and at first I wasn't even sure I had heard it at all. Everyone's eyes turned to Jasper, but he didn't notice he was staring transfixed at Rosalie. When he finally turned to us his eyes held the same blazing determination that I just saw in Edwards.

"I'll pass." He was staring at Edward and I turned around to look at him. He looked shocked, it was etched clearly into his perfect expression. His eyes flew to me, searching for something.

"Why?" he asked when he looked up to them.

"Because, you deserve it more than I do, I can wait a few more weeks. Hell, years even, if it means that you can finally be with her the way you wanted to." Rose said.

"She's right you know. I know how you feel Edward. You always put other before yourself. For once just take what were offering you. Please, it's what both of us want." Sincerity rang in Jaspers voice and once again Edward looked to me.

"I'll do it." He said as he stared into my eyes. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief but I was still confused. What was he doing?

"I'm confused." I said to the room, and seven pairs of eyes turned to me. Edward smiled.

"I'm going to be human."


	2. Chapter 2

1**Disclaimer: Not Mine!**

**Pulse**

**Chapter 2: The Risks Involved**

I looked around the room at the Cullens, They were all smiling, the excitement on their faces was clearly evident on how much they approved of the news. I knew that Edward was happy; he had wanted this for eighty seven years and now he had the chance to get it, his humanity. Carlisle had given us a gift beyond anything material, he gave us a way for us to be together without my dying and leaving my friends and family to grieve over my 'death'. Edward would have a permanent reprieve from the pain that being with me caused him. I was happy. Really I was. Yet, I couldn't help but hear Carlisle's voice in my head:

"_I haven't had the opportunity to test it yet but I'm the possibility of it working correctly as of now is a bit over 89.00094 percent_."

What if it didn't work correctly? What if something went horribly wrong? I needed to know this was safe. If something went wrong I would never be able to live with myself. A part of why he was doing it was for me, and if anything happened to him because of it, I would hold myself responsible. I needed to know.

"What are the risks?" I asked, looking at Carlisle. His face softened as he realized where my question was coming from.

"I should probably explain how it works first, so you understand it better. I was thinking one day in my study how dialysis machines worked. It purifies the blood for patients with kidney problems; it can also act as sort of a mechanical heart during heart surgery in which the heart stops. The plan is to get as much O - positive blood we can and give a transfusion. We would first have to rid your system of all the venom so that you body is actually using the blood to flood the tissues and blood vessels rather than the venom just soaking it in to use as sustenance. When the venom reaches a minimal amount, we'll start the transfusion. When the blood has completely filled all the veins and tissues, we'll use a high voltage electrical shock in hopes to jumpstart the heart and cause it to resume beating."

"What will happen if you can't get all the venom out?" Jasper asked.

"Your body will use the blood from the transfusion."

"And erase whatever control you have against the pull of human's." I said as it dawned on me.

"That's right." His face was solemn; he knew I wasn't done yet.

"If you do successfully remove the venom and start with the transfusion, what will happen to him?"

"He will have to be restrained. He'll have never been as thirsty as the point when all of the blood is gone. When the venom leaves the system, so will all the blood you've consumed. It should calm when the venom can't carry the blood and it goes straight into the veins and organs." I opened my mouth to ask something else, but Carlisle raised his hand to silence me as he began to speak again.

"Once the body is flooded with blood, we'll start the shock treatments. It should jumpstart the heart. I f the heart will not beat, his control will be lost too, he will need to start resisting all over again. And if it does work, and the heart starts and then stops, we have failed completely and he may die if we cannot re-inject him with the venom for the change. The chance that all of this will go wrong is small and the reward for it working successfully is well worth the risk." Everyone in the room was staring at me, trying to see how I was going to react to this new information. I didn't need to hear anymore. Or my mind was made up.

"No. I won't let you do it." I turned to Edward who was looking at me contentedly.

"Bella-" Rosalie started before I cut her off.

"No! I could lose him, Rose, I won't risk it."

"It's not your risk to take." Alice said quietly, her eyes on the floor rather than on me.

I glared, at Alice; I could tell by the looks on everyone's faces that I looked a bit scarier than I ever had around them.

"Bella," Edward said calmly, his voice barely above a whisper.

"No." I was becoming hysterical. I had to leave. I jumped up from my spot on the couch, grabbed my keys and walked out the door. I couldn't even look at the house as I started my truck. Within seconds I was on the road, the gas peddle was on the floor and the engine was protesting. The whole car began to shake as I reached sixty. It might be time to start saving up for a new car.

A tapping sound made me jump and I barely kept the truck in the road. I looked over at where the noise came from and immediately laughed. Edward was running alongside my truck. I looked down at the speedometer it read: 63mph. I slowed down and pulled over onto the shoulder, Edward, got into the cab without a word. His hair was windblown; his skin was gleaming in the sunlight. We rode the rest of the way to my house in silence. He made no move to talk and I wasn't about to ruin the comfortable air between us at the moment. I knew it would be shattered as soon as I closed the door to my house. Charlie wouldn't be home so there was no need to wait till we got in my room. I parked in my usual spot and reached for the door handle, only to find it already open with Edward waiting beside it. He didn't wait for me to out of the car myself, but reached in and picked me up off the seat and carried me inside. He set me down gently once we were inside. I thought he would start asking me questions or arguing with me, but instead, he shocked me by grabbing my hand lightly in his own and leading me to the kitchen. He pulled out my chair for me and took it .Instead of taking the one he always took he sat in Charlie's seat. When he finally spoke, after nearly five minutes in silence, he did not yell or argue as I expected. Instead, he said in a low steady voice, "I am doing it, Isabella." I immediately opened my mouth to protest but Edward, having somehow moved to me from Charlie's chair in seconds, already had his pointer finger pressed lightly against my lips.

"Let me explain first," I regarded him slowly, his eyes were light, a result of last weeks torturous weekend long hunting trip, but they held a pleading edge. I sat back and folded my arms against my chest. He took it as a sign and moved away from me to sit back into a chair. He paused, unable to find a place to start.

"You have no idea how it kills me to know that to be with me you have to give up everything else that matters. You're going to give up your life, your future to be with me. How do you think that makes me feel, Bella, to know that I'm going to cause you death? The fact that I cause you any pain kills me. I hate that I can't take you out in the summer because I have to avoid sunlight. That you can't go to a restaurant with me without feeling awkward because you're the only one eating. I put you at risk every second I'm with you; I can't even touch you without restraint. I don't want this, Bella. I never did. The only good to come out of this hellish existence is that I was around to meet you!" His eyes were blazing as he stared at me; during his rant he had moved up for his chair and started to pace the room. I had never seen him so upset without someone being hurt.

"But what if it doesn't work? What if all of your control is lost? Then what am I going to do? You won't be allowed near people, you won't be able to contain you're thirst and I will be that much harder for us." My voice was small but somehow I managed to keep it even. Edward sighed, his shoulders loose. He looked thoughtful for a moment before he found the words. "Then I'll have Carlisle change you." He said, sounding defeated, I knew what he was doing; he was giving me what I wanted. But what should I do? I could let him go through with this, let him risk his life for a chance being human or what? Tell him no? Even if I did refuse to back him up he could just as well do it anyway. He wanted this, it was written clearly on his face. Who was I to tell him no, to deny him his happiness?

I couldn't; either way we would be together. I was sure of it. I looked at him and nodded.

"Okay," I said, "We'll try it." My words caused him to grin madly at me and he scooped me up in my arms and spun me around in the room, both of us laughing like idiots. When we were both catching our breath on the couch in the living room, he once again got serious.

"Carlisle found a room to perform the procedure in tomorrow."

I nodded numbly. Tomorrow my life would change forever.

**Special thanks to BellaNova for agreeing to be my Beta reader. If you liked it let me know. Also, if you have any ideas don't be afraid to share. Don't forget to review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclamier:Not Mine!**

**Pulse**

**Chapter 3: Scared?**

We lay holding each other that night, Edward's face in the crook of my neck. He was breathing deeply, imprinting my scent into his brain in the hopes of his senses becoming dulled with only my smell. After over an hour of trying to fall to sleep I heard him whisper in my ear. "It is going to be fine, Bella, Carlisle is not going to let anything happen to me. Plus, if something goes wrong, which it won't, he can just change me again. I won't leave you, Bella,." He pressed a soft kiss on the skin behind my earlobe.

"I promise." he assured me, and I believed him, truly I did. .When I finally succumbed to exhaustion, my dreams were riddles with visions of Edward screaming on a surgical table.

In what seemed like seconds after I closed my eyes Edward's cool hands were gently shaking me awake. It was a Saturday, and Charlie had gone down to La Push to go fishing with Billy, so Edward and I went downstairs together. I walked into the kitchen and got my usual breakfast: A chocolate chip granola bar ad a glass of orange juice.

I turned to find Edward already sitting in his normal seat and I took mine by his side. He seemed anxious and I couldn't help but smile. He looked like a kid on Christmas day who was waiting to open his presents.

"What?" he asked, having noticed my smile. He grinned at me.What's with the smile?"

"Oh, nothing," I said smoothly. "I've just never seen you look like this before."He cocked his head to the side, raising one eyebrow in question.

"Like what?"

"Like a kid on Christmas day. When are we meeting Carlisle at the hospital?" I asked, popping the last piece of my granola bar into my mouth.

"In an hour." "I should probably got take a shower then. Human moment?" He chuckled as I walked up the stairs. I showered and dressed quickly, not really paying attention to much of anything. My mind was on other things, like the fact that in a few hours I may either had a human boyfriend, a vampire boyfriend who couldn't come near me, or worse, not boyfriend at all.

Edward was still in his spot at the kitchen table when I came down the steps, careful not to fall. It didn't look like he moved at all, yet his eyes met mine as I walked into the kitchen.

"I am." He said suddenly. His facial features brightening as he smiled. Meanwhile, I was lost.

"Huh?"

" I said 'I am'. This is like Christmas, and I'm getting the present of my dreams."

"You're soul?" he looked at me and smiled wider, revealing his perfectly lethal teeth.

"No, silly Bella, I get a full life with you." he said sweetly before his mouth covered mine in one of our riskiest kisses yet When he pulled back we were both grinning like idiots. We both knew that if the procedure worked there would no longer be any boundaries between us.

We headed out the door and were parking in the hospital parking lot all within ten minutes. "Carlisle Cullen please." Edward asked politely to the receptionist, who paged him immediately, everyone knew who the Cullens were and they were never given any problems. After a short wait Carlisle came out of the surgical ward, he smiled when he saw Edward's face, still holding it's Christmas morning glow.

"Follow me, everyone's waiting." he said smiling. We complied as he led us through the ultra bright hallways. He opened the door to one of the vacant room and we walked in.

Esme, Jasper, Rosalie, Alice, and Emmett were all standing there expectantly for us. All of their faces masking worry with smiles. I looked around the roomtaking in all of the wires and machines that were placed neatly on trays around the room. There were three bright red coolers resting on the table closest to the metal table in the center of the room.

I had been expecting the equipment, so it wasn't bothering me to badly. It was on of the most unnoticeable things in the room that caused my hair to stand on end. There, connected to the cold grey table, was a pair of manacles. I had figured they would need something to hold him down, but seeing it made what was bout to happen all the more real. I turned to him then and tried to my best to look reassuring. Jasper wasn't fooled, he was standing in the farthest corner of the room, as far away from me as the small room would allow. He was dousing the room with short bursts of calm, and for once I was grateful. I needed calm.

"Are you ready?" Carlisle asked laying a hand on Edward's shoulder.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

"Are you ready?" Asked Carlisle from behind me; he laid his hand on my shoulder. I looked to Bella who was standing stiffly looking at me. I knew she was scared, we all did. I was still reeling from the fact that I had not had to argue with her over it the whole night. I was glad that she was here with me. I nodded to him and he led me to the table. Not once did my eyes stray from Bella's, the love shinning there was enough for me to climb up on the table. I was nervous, and I hate to admit, slightly scared. But I knew I was in capable hands and that my family would never let anything happen to me. I smiled reassuringly at Bella, who smiled weakly back.

"Lay back." Carlisle said as he checked over all of the equipment lying on the surgical trays. I did as he instructed as he picked up something only I knew he had. When we were preparing the wolves to fight a few weeks ago, Carlisle found on of their claws lying on the ground. It would be the only thing that could pierce my tough as nails skin. I stretched out my forearm, palm out on the table so he had better access. My eyes again sought out the comfort of Bella's soft brown orbs. I held back a wince as Carlisle slashed at my wrist so that he could put the needle in the vein without it shattering. He looked at me apologetically. Then, I caught jasper out of the corned of my eye, he had winced when I was holding mine back.

"Jasper, maybe you should leave." He looked at me, puzzled.

"Why?"

"Because this isn't going to be very pleasant for you and you may have to get through it more than once if you're not after me." I kept my voice even, even as I could feel the venom dripping from the wound in my forearm.

"Edward, I'm going to begin drawing it out now. It may be a good idea for you to put the restraints on before we start." Jaspers face hardened at Carlisle's words. I sighed and turned away, he would not be moving now, he was too much of a fighter for that.

I nodded at Carlisle and placed my hands in the shackles while Carlisle tied my feet down. My eyes flashed to Bella for an instant, she looked like she was about to cry. I smiled her favorite smile at her trying to look as reassuring as I could. It didn't seem to work, she smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. I lay back on the table, looking up at the bright white ceiling as he clicked the machine on. I could hear the gears turning and the air shooting out of it as it pumped the venom out of my system. Normally, while the blood id being pumped out more blood is being added, that wasn't the case this time. Carlisle had rigged the machine to not push in the blood until he clicked a switch I saw shining like a beacon on the side of it, the red standing out against the shiny white surface. I could feel the pull of the machine in my arm and I silently cursed my highly sensitive skin. I risked a glance at the machine; the tubes were full of a shiny clear fluid, my venom, and it was drawing out more and more of it with each rotation of the wheels. My eyes flickered to Bella as her scent became suddenly stronger. She was huddled against Alice, whose arms were around her. I must have looked odd because her eyes became suddenly worried. My eyes had most likely begun to darken; I could feel the burning becoming more sever in my throat, the burning in my stomach. My body was begging for sustenance.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

His eyes were black, not the onyx black they were when he was angry or the flint-like black they were when he had waited just a tad to long to go hunting. Instead, they were so dark it was like looking into a bottomless pit. It was void of all color. His adams apple bobbed as he licked his lips and swallowed hard; His chest wasn't moving, he had stopped breathing.

"Were almost done with this part Edward, you have about five more minutes until we flush with the fluid." Carlisle spoke softly into his ear. He nodded gravely as he swallowed again. I turned to look at Jasper, he was standing in the corner by the door, as far away from us as he could get. His hands were clutched to his side you could clearly see the white if his knuckles thought his pale skin. He was looking down at the floor, lines of strain etched into his forehead. Edward was right, he should have left this was torturing the both of them.

A low growl sounding out in the nearly silent room, and my head turned to find it. Edward was clenching his fists against the metal table; it was bending under his strength. He was looking at the ceiling, but when I turned to look at him, his head slowly moved and our eyes met. I couldn't muffle the sharp intake of breath that was tore from my lungs. It looked like the color form his iris's had bled out turning the whole cornea into a black pool of emptiness. "Edward." Carlisle warned, his hand moving to Edwards shoulder should he be forced to hold him down. "Were going to start the fluid now." His eyes flickered to Jasper and Emmett and the both came forward to stand on either end of the table. Jasper stood by his feet while Emmett took his arms. Carlisle removed his hands from Edward's shoulder and turned the second machine on before turning the first machine off. I had a feeling this part was going to be the worst by far.

I was right.

Edward hissed, his hands clenching and his teeth clamping shut. He was looking back at the ceiling now, his eyes were closed tensely. Then he screamed, I had never heard a sound so horrid. His eyes flew open and his hands came up violently.

I heard a soft ping as the first restraint broke.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Not Mine!**

**Pulse**

**Chapter 4: Rebirth**

Emmett held his arm down as he screamed, his body contorting in agony. I was leaning back into Alice, trying desperately to hold back my tears. I knew that he was doing this so that he could be with me, and that a I was causing him this pain, eve thought it was indirectly, it was still partially my fault. His scream slowed to growls and then stopped. He was beginning to calm like Carlisle had said he would. The procedure was almost over, the only parts left was the rest of the blood transfusion, which Carlisle had already begun, and the shock. My gaze was locked on Edward as I stood rigid beside Alice. I noticed a pair of hands rubbing calming circles on my shoulders and was shocked when I turned to find Rosalie looking at me nervously. I managed a weak smile before I turned back to Edward. I was waiting for him to begin to scream again but he only groaned slightly as his tissues were soaking up the blood.

"Were almost done here." Carlisle, his tone that of a surgeon other than the Carlisle I had seen just yesterday. It was odd how he could so completely switch roles from someone I considered family to full on doctor mode. Every set of eyes in the room were focused on either me of Edward and for once, I wasn't turning red at the attention. I was too worried about the still form on the table to worry much about me. At the current moment, I didn't matter. Only Edward did.

Edwards breath was coming in quick short pants now, and for once more his head turned to me. His eyes had changed they were no longer the void black as before. Instead, they were a brilliant red. My mind flashed instantly to a memory of Victoria in the meadow launching for me with intent to kill me. But instead of fear, I felt relieved, happy even that this would soon be over. Hopefully, the outcome being a good one. Carlisle movement caused my eyes flicker to him. He was reaching for the shock paddles, not bothering with the gel he turned the machine on, the sound of he change hitting them sounding odd in the suddenly quiet room. This was it. He reached over and turned the dialysis machine off. The heart monitor flat lined, and he quickly and with precision placed the paddles on Edwards chest. "Clear!" he yelled, most likely out of habit, then he pressed the button down. I could hear the charge being released. Unlike in the movies his body did not suddenly jerk up off of the table. I wasn't even sure if it was supposed to since he was a vampire. Edward's eyes flew open and he gasped. Then his eyes closed and his head rolled slightly, his breath coming out in a great whoosh. I nearly cried out at the sight if it. I was suddenly stricken with fear. Fear that that would be the last time I saw his eyes open, the last time he would take a breath whether it was needed or not. Carlisle turned the dial on the defibrillator and paced them again to Edwards chest, he yelled 'clear' again and Edward stayed unmoving. Hi eyes were still closed, his head still tilted to the side. He looked like he was sleeping but I knew that that wasn't the case. A ghostly hush filled the room. The only sound heard was the shrill screeching of the heart monitor. " Come on," I whispered. Then we heard the one sound we had all been waiting for, the consistent beeping that indicated a heartbeat and my heart soared.

"Bella," Edward whispered, barely loud enough for me to hear him. His voice was scratchy probably as a result of the screaming .I rushed to his side, my eyes searching for any sign of injury, the whole time severely aware of the still constant beeping of the heart monitor.

"I'm here, Edward. I'm here." I was stroking his hair as his eyes fluttered open. When he saw me he smiled weakly, taking a deep breath. I couldn't help but gasp as his eyes settled on my own. They were no longer the butterscotch color nor were they black or the vivid red they had been. Instead they were a bright dazzling green with flecks of a color that reminded me of warm honey.

"Bella," he said, his voice stronger this time. His hand came up from beside him and he wrapped his arm around my neck he tugged me down and my eyes widened in alarm as out lips crashed together.

The world fell away until it was only the two of us.

Edward's lips parted as his tongue darted out rubbing lightly on my bottom lip. I opened my mouth as he slipped in. This was heaven; we could finally do whatever we wanted without the constant threat of me breaking.

I'm not sure how long we were kissing but we were suddenly interrupted by a cattle call, undoubtedly Emmett's doing. I jumped back, already feeling the blush creeping up my neck. Edward sighed, we were both panting, too caught in the moment to even pull apart to breathe earlier. Edward sat up shakily before he lifted his eyes from my own and let them travel around the room, like he was seeing everyone for the first time. He frowned, his lips turning down as his mouth closed.

"What's wrong?" I whispered. Surely there couldn't be anything wrong yet, it just happened. Carlisle said it would be alright, he told me it would be alright.

"I-I can't hear anything." he looked so confused. What did he mean he couldn't hear anything? He just hear me asking him what was wrong, he even answered me. Apparently Carlisle knew what he was referring to, for he spoke, "Of course not, Edward, you're human now, you don't get to keep you abilities. They will revert back to how they were when you were human I suppose, thought they may be a little bit stronger since you've had them for so long." Edward turned to me, a smile on his face that caused his eyes to light up. I smiled back, his happiness affecting me, washing over me like a tidal wave. Today was officially the happiest moment in my life to date.

"I guess everyone's like you now, I can finally hear only my own thoughts." He reached out and took my hand in his, I was still shocked at the warmth of it, the difference in texture was astounding.

"So," Alice questioned, looking at Edward and I.

"What is next?" her question was followed by a loud rumble that was louder that the heart monitor, which was still, to my relief, beeping steadily, I grinned.

"Next, we feed the humans."

**Sorry it took so long guys, I was working on another story that I'm writing along with another author. You should check it out. It's called: **_**Let Me Be The One Who Calls You Baby. **_**It's also my first AH piece. Anywhoo…hope you liked it, drop a review and check out lmbtowcyb. Man that's a long title. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Not Mine!**

**Pulse**

**Chapter 5: It's not so bad.**

I couldn't keep the smile off of my face, it seemed like it would stay there forever, despite my jaw protesting. It was the strangest thing to fell now, the muscles in my jaw protesting. It was pain, yet I wouldn't have given it up for anything now. To be able to feel pain, human pain was a miracle to me. Who'd of thought that after nearly ninety years I was human once again. As my gaze swept along the room among the faces of my family I realized that my mood seemed to be infectious. Everyone was smiling, even Rosalie seemed genuinely happy. I moved, swinging my legs over the edge of the shockingly cold table. Bella took my hand in hers and I couldn't help but grin at the fact that I wasn't instantly bombarded with thirst. I slid off of the table but to my surprise my knees buckled and I found myself falling to the ground. I closed my eyes waiting for the impact that never came. I looked up to find myself being held up by my arm by, Bella, who had a surprised look on her face. I couldn't help but chuckle at the irony of it, after all the times I had stopped her from falling the tables were turned. She smiled at me as the shock wore off. Emmett laughed, interrupting the silence.

"You're like Bella!" he managed to yell between laughs. Not long after the rest of us joined him, it _was _funny when you thought about it.

"Are you ready to go home now, Edward?" Esme asked when we had all finally settled down enough to be coherent. I stood up shakily from the floor and nodded, everyone began to file out through the door until it was only Alice, Bella, and I left. I took a hesitant step forward. It was different walking now, I had to work each muscle with more effort than I had to before. Before I hardly had to think about my movements, my muscles were like steel cords walking was simple and it took little to no effort whereas now, my muscles were more like silly puddy. I managed to make it, without incident, out of the hospital and into the my car.

"Are you sure you can drive?" Bella asked as she buckled her seatbelt. I scoffed,

"Bella, I'm human, not blind, I can drive just as well as before." I said as she rolled her eyes.

"Okay, okay. I was just wondering, you don't have to get all macho on me. You're breakable now, I just wanted to make sure you realized that."

She was worried about me. It was something I'd noticed when before I left one of the heart monitoring pads slipped off and the machine flat lined, I could see her flinch as if someone had hit her. Her eyes raked over me and I squeezed her hand reassuringly.

I stared the engine and pulled out of the parking lot when an odd feeling hit my stomach. "Are you alright?" She must have seen my posture change.

"I'm fine," I assured her. "I'm just getting used to all of this, it's been a while." I said smirking. I was reaching for the radio when my stomach rumbled. Well that was odd. Bella laughed.

"Time to feed the humans." she said grinning. I was sure my face held a shocked expression.

"Where do you want to go?" the question, for once, was aimed at me. I thought of all the places that I had taken Bella to where she said that food had been good. I had to admit that I wasn't to excited about eating, I had smelled the food when I was a vampire and it didn't smell to appetizing, and the pizza I'd bitten in the cafeteria when I was with Bella had tasted like mold. I settled for the restaurant that I had taken her to when I found her in Seattle that night. It didn't take us long to get there with my driving. My stomach was feeling uncomfortable empty. We walked in and the waiter, a guy this time, took us to our seats. I grinned when he led us to the same table.

"What can I get you to drink?" he asked politely.

"Two cokes." Bella said smiling at me.

She was enjoying this. The waiter, Matt, nodded and went off to put our drink order in.

"So," Bella said, "How does it feel?"

"I feel...heavy." I admitted as she chuckled.

"It's weird, having to make an effort to move. I feel weak, it's awkward." Bella's face sobered as her eyes locked on mine.

"Do you regret it?" she asked sheepishly, yet her voice held an undercurrent of something else, something that sounded too much like guilt for me to bear.

"No," I said immediately.

"I don't care about being weak, or being more breakable. I did this because I wanted to, Bella, don't you dare think for one second that I regret it. Do you have any idea how amazing it is to be warm? To be able to feel my heart thundering in my chest?" I looked down at our hands, entwined in the center of the table.

"That I for one second would trade this for anything in the world." I said, lifting our joined hand off of the table.

She smiled and it touched her eyes, causing them to light up. The waiter came back and placed out glasses on the table.

"Are you ready to order or do you need more time?"

"I'll have the mushroom ravioli." she stated with a smirk, the same thing she ordered the last time we were here, it seemed like the time from then to now was years apart, everything had changed to quickly.

"And for you?" I didn't hesitate when he asked me, I had after all come here for this. It seemed fitting to be my first meal.

"I'll have the same, thank you." he nodded and went to place our orders. I looked, once again, to Bella. Only to find her eyes darting from me to the soda that was sitting harmlessly near my hand. I sighed as I picked it up, here goes nothing I thought as I brought the glass to my lips.

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO**

B.p.o.v.

I knew the moment the soda hit his lips. His eyes widened as his Adams apple bobbed as he swallowed. Is hand quickly placed the soda back on the table as he gagged. His chest jumping as he struggled for breath.

"What's in this stuff!?" he asked when he caught his breath.

"It's soda. It's carbonated so it's fizzy. I probably should have warned you to take a smaller sip. If you don't know what it tastes like it's like bubbles bursting on your tongue, it burns a bit I guess. Are you okay?"

Edward took a deep breath and nodded.

"I think I'll just stick to water. Last I checked water wasn't normally acidic."

We sat in companionable silence for a bit, yet I couldn't help but notice that Edward seemed to be listening for something. It must be weird for him, I realized, he'd been sharing his brain with everyone who was in a close enough proximity to him for nearly 90 years. Now, the only voices in his head were his own.

"How is it? To hear only your own thoughts in your head I mean." His head tilted slightly as he pondered my question. It didn't take him long to reply, the word tumbling easily from his mouth.

"It's weird, everything is so different I haven't yet gotten the chance to really get used to it. I've been hearing other people's thought for so long that I got used to it. After a while that was normal for me. I can't say that there wasn't a time where I wished that I could be everyone else's type of normal. There were times that I detested being able to read other peoples thoughts. Thoughts are private, it's really the only part of a person life that they alone can control. They hold their most private moment locked in their minds. Things that no one should ever see, that are theirs alone. It was tolerable, most of the time anyway. But there were times, when I came to close to someone who was grieving, that I felt like even more of a monster than ever. I have no right to barge into someone's thoughts when they are feeling so low, are so void of life, that their thoughts are all that they have. I felt like I was taking it all away from them and they didn't even know it,"

"It may be weird for me now, but it's more of a relief than anything. Even thought it could be helpful at times, I wouldn't wish for them back. Besides," he said smirking.

"It's not exactly pleasant hearing the thoughts of every single couple in their houses being intimate at night. That it something I defiantly won't be missing." He finished just as the waiter placed our food on the table. Edward looked at it in disgust. His nostrils flared and his eyes widened slightly. This was defiantly going to be fun.

"Do you need anything else?" Matt asked politely.

"Were fine for now," I said grinning. I skewered a piece of ravioli and brought it to my mouth.

"You're supposed to eat it, Edward, not stare at it." He rolled his eyes as he picked up his forked and mimicked my movements. Unlike with the soda, when the pasta hit his mouth his eyes widened in surprise, not revulsion. He chewed slowly at first them with more fervor before swallowing. Within seconds he was chewing another piece.

I smiled as I chuckled at his actions. Just seconds ago he was looking at it like it was dirt now he was eating it like he's never eaten anything in his life. Well, I thought, it had been a while.

"What?" he asked when he finally took a chance to breath, looking at me with a sheepish grin. He was still the most beautiful person I'd ever seen. I didn't say anything, instead I looked from him to the plate in front of him, a knowing smile tugging on the corners of my mouth.

His smile grew wider.

"It's not so bad." He said nonchalantly. That was it, I broke out laughing causing every head in the restaurant to turn to us. Then, I saw one of the best sights ever. A vibrant blush spread across Edwards ivory skin.


End file.
